Happy 250th Birthday, America!

Thanks to our Founding Fathers for having the courage to break away from tyranny and to the brave men and women of the armed forces over all these years for keeping this great nation safe and protected, we get to celebrate today. Happy 250th Birthday, America!

I miss you, Momma...

Another year has passed... making today 9 years that you've been gone, Momma. I can't believe it's almost been a decade since you left this world. It just doesn't seem real to me... It never has. Sadly, the fact remains that it is very real and it's never gotten any easier to deal with. I've accepted that it probably never will. I don't think it's ever really supposed to. You being gone has left such a massive void in my life... I know I say it every year on this day, but I miss you.. I wish you were still here. I would honestly give anything just to have a 5 minute conversation with you.. if for nothing more than to simply hear your voice again and to be able to laugh with you like we always used to. We were always in our own little world when we talked and I miss that more than you'll ever know... I miss my Mom, my best friend, and my other half. It was always you, Momma. It's no wonder I'm so screwed up these days. Half of me died the day you did. I just try to keep on keeping on because I know in my heart that's what you'd want me to do. There is so much more I could say but I think I'll end this here. I hope you know that you are loved, remembered, and sorely missed... Rest easy, Momma... I love you always... ❤️

Here's my song to you. I've listened to it every year on this day since you've been gone.

Happy Birthday, Momma...

Today was always a special day for not just you, but for me as well. I loved this day because it was the day you were brought into this world back in 1958. 20 years later you became my Mother and my best friend... While I don't always see eye to eye with our creator, I will ALWAYS be thankful to him for giving me the best Mom any Son could have ever asked for. My prayer for the day is that you're up there in Heaven with Grandma, Pappaw, and your twin girls celebrating this wonderful day together.

Happy Birthday, Momma... I love and miss you always... ❤️

Happy Mother's Day, Momma...

Today marks the 9th Mother's Day I've had to celebrate without you and it never gets any easier... It still hurts just as much as the 1st Mother's day I had to go through without you. This was always a day I looked forward to because it was special to me just as much as it was to you. First and foremost, you chose me and gave me life... You were the first love I ever knew in this world. You were always there for me through the good and the bad times... You were my voice of reason, my comfort, my safe place, my rock, and the person that kept me going in this screwed up world... We formed a special bond from day one and we had that bond up until your dying day... That was the worst day of my life and a huge part of me died right along with you... You were always my other half, Momma... it was ALWAYS you. I've cried an ocean of tears from the pain of you being gone... I know I'll never get over you being gone. I can't. It's just something I'm not capable of doing. I miss you more than you will ever know... I miss my best friend... I miss our talks and the time we got to spend together. I only got 38 years with you and it just wasn't enough. I know even if we had been lucky enough to get more time together, I still never would have been ready to lose you. I hate death... I always have. It breaks my heart that everything good in this life eventually goes away one way or another. I wish there was a way I could hug you one more time... that would do me a WORLD of good just to feel your love one more time because I'm lost without you, Momma... I just am. I pretend that I'm ok but I never really am. I've never been the same since you died... Billy Bob Thornton said this about losing a loved one: "There is a melancholy inside me that never goes away. I'm 50% happy and 50% sad at any given moment." and that is exactly how it is... that's grief. It comes in waves... Some days I manage to be alright, other days I'm drowning... much like today. I just want to say thank you for everything you ever did for me... I will never be able to thank you enough and even though today is no longer a happy day for me... It still means the world to me. I will continue to honor you and celebrate every year that I have left on this earth... Happy Mother's Day, Momma... I love you. ❤️

Happy Birthday to me...

Well... today is my Birthday. My old ass is 47 now! It kind of sucks that I have to spend the day alone but It is what it is. At the end of the day, I'm thankful that I'm still here. With all the heart issues I've been having I think it's a gift all in itself to say that I made another trip around the sun. I think I'm gonna spend the day playing World of Warcraft. Special thanks to my Brother for hooking me up with the new WoW expansion! Love you, dude!

Thank you, Charlie... RIP

I'm currently watching the Charlie Kirk Memorial and I have been touched by the worship songs so much so that I am rededicating my life to The Lord Jesus Christ. It's time I go all in and stop riding the fence. I have always believed in God but I have struggled all my life where religion is concerned. I've gone back and forth so many times now that I've lost count at this point. I remember talking to both my Mom and Grandma when they were still alive about this and they said I can't be on the fence... I'm either all in or I'm all out. Well, today I am choosing to be all in! I'm far from perfect, but I love Jesus and I believe in him. I am choosing to trust in him and live my life the way he wants me to.

From this day forward I am going to try my best to live the life God wants me to live. After what I saw online from the far left mocking, laughing, and celebrating Charlie Kirk's murder, I finally realized evil is very real and it's not hiding anymore... It's right out there for all to see. It's not even about left vs right, it's about good vs evil! We are absolutely living in the end times and I chose to be on the right side of things. I chose the side of good! I just want to close by saying thank you to Charlie Kirk for inspiring me and renewing my faith... You lead the way, Charlie... Rest forever in the arms of our Lord Jesus Christ and say hi to my Mom, Grandma, and Grandpa up there in Heaven... I pray with all of my being that I am able to join them when it's my time.

RIP Ryno...

I woke up this morning to find out yet another favorite of mine has passed away... Ryne Sandberg was always my favorite baseball player and he passed away last night. What is going on? This week has been AWFUL for celebrities that I always looked up to. First we had Ozzy.. 2 days later we had Hulk Hogan.. now 5 days after that we have Ryne Sandberg... This week has SUCKED! I'm so tired of death... Rest easy, Ryno... Thanks for the memories!

Rest in peace, Hulkster...

Wow.,.. just two days after loosing my musical hero, Ozzy... now my childhood hero is gone... 2025 sucks... This man brought me so much joy as a kid and on into my early adult years. He remained as someone I always admired and looked up to. I hate this... all my heroes are dying... I'm so tired of death... All I can say is thank you, Hulk Hogan... you helped make my childhood better. I said my prayers and I took my vitamins! I was all in with Hulkamania. I get that Hulk Hogan was just a persona, but what a persona! You were the best that ever did it! Rest easy, Hulkster. I'm gonna miss you...

Rest easy, Ozzy... You will be missed!

Wow... this one really hurts. I just found out that Ozzy Osbourne passed away today. I'm really at a loss for words because this man has been my all time favorite singer for as long as I can remember. His music has been a huge part of what makes up the soundtrack to my life and I personally feel there is no one else that did it like Ozzy did it. Not only has his music meant a lot to me but it was also a huge common bond that my Mother and I shared together.. our mutual love of both Ozzy and his music. Since she passed away back in 2017, every time I'd hear an Ozzy song I would smile because it reminded me of her. His music helped keep her memory alive for me so he meant even more to me. Now he's gone... While I never knew him on a personal level, his music impacted my life in a huge way and I'm really going to miss him... Ozzy? Thank you for the wonderful music you gave to the world over all these many years... Say hi to my Mom for me up there, Sir... Rest easy, Ozzy... you will be sorely missed!

Talk about an end of an era...

Wow, so where do I even begin? Black Sabbath played their final show just a couple days ago and I've had to take time to process it. I felt now is a good time to share my thoughts. First of all, Black Sabbath are the originators of the genre of music I love more than any other.. Heavy Metal! They are the Godfathers and anyone that loves metal the way I do would know it's because of them that we have so many amazing metal bands to this day. So for that, they have my respect, appreciation, and admiration. Not just that.. but Ozzy Osbourne has been my ALL TIME favorite singer for most all of my life... not just that but he is the one artist that my Mom and I shared such a common bond with. ANY time I hear a song from Ozzy I always think of my Mother and as bitter-sweet as that is, I thank Ozzy for helping to keep my Mother's memory alive. It's really an end of an era... the pioneers of metal have retired and called it a day. While they have all absolutely earned the right to retire, it sucks that we'll never get to see them on stage again, but that's how life goes. Everything that has a beginning, has an end. I just want to say THANK YOU to all the members of Black Sabbath... especially Ozzy for creating the soundtrack to my life. There will never be another band like Black Sabbath... I guess all that's left to be said is: Don't be sad that it's over, be happy that it happened! Enjoy retirement, gentlemen... cheers!

Today makes 8 years that you've been gone, Momma... It's been a rough 8 years going on without you. Not a day goes by where I'm not thinking about you in one way or another. You're in everything I do... listening to music, watching tv shows or movies, or even when I just sit quietly alone as I do all too often. You left me with a lot of wonderful memories and I thank you for that. I thank you for being the best Mother any kid could ever ask for. I thank you for being not only my Mother but also my best friend in this screwed up world. I wish everyday that you were still here... I have lost count of the times I've wanted to just call you on the phone and talk like we always used to... There have been so many times that I've needed you but the reality of you being gone always slaps me in the face... it just doesn't get any easier and I really don't think it ever will. You were too big a part of my life for me to ever "move on" or "get over it"... Grief never really seems to go away and I think that's exactly how it's supposed to be.. I read something years ago that said: "Grief is the last act of love we give to our loved ones that pass away. Where there is deep grief, there was great love." and let's face it, you really were the great love of my life. You were the only one that ever truly had my back in ALL situations of life. You were always there... and I will never be able to thank you enough for that. I miss you every day, Momma... I really do hope when it's my time to cross over that we'll see each other again. That's really all I hope for anymore... I love you... always and forever. ❤️

Happy Birthday, Momma...

While I think about you all the time... It's days like today where I think about you the most... Happy Birthday, Momma... I love you. ❤️

Today marks the 8th Mother's Day I've had to celebrate without my Mom being here and it still doesn't seem real to me. This time of year used to be a happy time in my life... I got to celebrate my Mom for being the best Mom any kid could ever ask for... But now it's become a day of sadness for me because she isn't here anymore. Her absence has left a hole in my heart... I've really only felt like half a person since she passed away. The bond we shared was something I was always so grateful for... I'm thankful I got to have her in my life for 38 years... I just wish it could have been longer, I wasn't ready for her to leave... but then.. I don't suppose I ever would have been ready.. who ever really is? Death will always be the part of life I hate the most... I just hope that wherever she on the other side that she's at peace. I love you, Momma and I miss you terribly... For as long as I have left to live, I will continue to celebrate you on this day... Happy Mother's Day. ❤

It's that time of year again...

I used to love this time of year.. but now May and June both have become the worst part of the year for me... for obvious reasons. Coming up on 8 years of my Mom being gone now... still doesn't seem possible to me. I miss you, Momma... 😢

Happy Easter!

While I'm not the most religious person in the world, I do believe in God and his Son Jesus. I acknowledge what today is... HE HAS RISEN! To those of you that celebrate, Happy Easter! I hope you all have a wonderful day.

Welcome back, President Trump!

My morning coffee tastes better this morning than it normally does! I feel hope again as an American for the first time in awhile. I love knowing we're back to having real leadership again in America. Glad to have you back, President Trump! You Sir really are the best President I've ever known in my lifetime. I look forward to the coming 4 years. I believe you are right when you said this really will be the golden years of America! God bless you Sir and God bless America! We finally get to heal. What a great feeling that is!

Happy New Year!

Hard to believe 2024 is already over... to me this year really seemed to go by super fast. I suppose that's normal as we get older.. the years just seem to fly by at warp speed. I can't believe I'm 46.. just 4 years shy of 50! I'm getting old! I got grey in my beard, my vision and hearing are complete crap, I have aches and pains in my body, I don't sleep worth a shit, and I move around now days like I'm an 80 year old man! lol... Fun times! Hey.. despite things having not been very good the last several years.. I'm thankful to still be alive! (It's better than the alternative!) I've become a shut-in homebody that doesn't get out anymore. I just spend my time alone these days. No family, significant other, or friends around anymore. It's just me doing my day to day thing. It definitely gets lonely but I've at least come to a point in my life where I have contentment. I have a roof over my head, I have food in my belly, and a space to call my own. I want more out of life but I'm at least thankful for what little I do have! That's about all I have to say for now. Not that anyone reads my posts, but on the slim chance someone actually stumbles upon this blog of mine.. Happy New Year! Here's to hoping it's a good one!

President Trump is back!

After yesterday's election, I just want to give a big Congratulations to Donald J. Trump! It's damn good to have you back, Sir! For the first time in a long time, I have hope again for the future! America can finally start to heal.

I've officially been a KoRn fan for 30 years!

I've been with these guys every step of the way! What a journey it's been... so many ups and downs, highs and lows, but through it all? KoRn has been there and they have my eternal gratitude for it. I can never thank them enough for doing what they do. Their music has been the soundtrack to my life! I honestly wouldn't have made it this far in life if it wasn't for their music. I've lost count of the times that they were therapy for me during the really bad times of my life. As I've been saying for the last 30 years, KoRn is more than just music, they're a way of life! I'll be a KoRn fan til the day I die. To the members of KoRn, I just want to say THANK YOU!

First day of Autumn!

Even though I don't get out to enjoy nature anymore, that still doesn't change the fact that it's the first day of Autumn, which happens to be my favorite time of the year.

🍂Happy Fall, Everyone!🍂